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Abnegado Zhang, el cuidador que lamió 1 hora las nalgas de un mono para hacerlo defecar

3 mayo 2012 - 15:08 - Autor:

“¡Por favor, no tiren cacahuetes a los monos!” Esta frase tan conocida debería tatuarse a la entrada de todos los zoos, para que los visitantes recuerden las duras implicaciones que a veces tiene este acto en la vida de los animales.

Y también en la de sus cuidadores, como es el caso del chino Zhang Bangsheng, que tuvo que estar una hora lamiendo las nalgas de un pequeño langur de Francois para que defecara un cacahuete que se le había quedado atascado en su tracto digestivo.

El pequeño langur de Francois (Trachypithecus francoisi), de sólo 3 meses de edad, es el primer ejemplar de esta especie que ha nacido en el Zoo Monkey de Wuhán (China central) en casi 10 años. Se trata de un primate muy raro en peligro de extinción de los que quedan menos de 500 ejemplares en Vietnam, y 1.500 en China, por lo que se encuentra entre los animales más protegidos del mundo.

El pasado primero de mayo, día festivo, el pequeño langur fue presentado en exposición por primera vez para satisfacer a los visitantes, que pudieran ver este mono tan único en el mundo. Al día siguiente, el viejo Zhang descubrió que el pequeño mono tenía indigestión y dificultad para defecar; y de inmediato se preocupó.

Al ver cáscaras en el suelo, el cuidador comprendió rápidamente que los visitantes habían arrojado cacahueses al mono, que todavía sin dientes había ingerido la totalidad de un fruto. Si no lo hacía rápidamente defecar, se podría poner en peligro la vida del ejemplar.

Y es en estos momentos donde se demuestra la pasta de la que está hecho un cuidador de 50 años con 30 de profesión. Debido a que el mono es demasiado pequeño, no era adecuado usar medicamentos para hacerlo evacuar. Tampoco se podía usar laxantes tópicos pues pueden causar alergias en monos tan jóvenes. Así que la forma menos traumática era lamerle el culo, para propiciar la expulsión por estimulación.

Y quién mejor para hacerlo que su cuidador de siempre, el que mejor le conoce. Primero utilizó agua tibia para limpiar las nalgas del pequeño mono, entonces comenzó a usar su boca para lamer, sin detenerse en más de una hora, hasta que el pequeño defecó una única y esplendorosa semilla de maní.

Sólo después de que el cacahuate rodó por el suelo, Zhang Bangsheng parece que se puso a reír con satisfacción.

Los primates tienen un gran talón de Aquiles en su tracto digestivo. De hecho existen estudios que afirman que la indigestión que provocará el calentamiento global puede ayudar a que los gorilas de montaña y otros primates comedores de hojas sean presa fácil para la extinción.

Las temperaturas medias anuales que prevén algunos modelos climáticos aumentarán 2 grados a mediados de siglo. Las hojas que crecen con el aire más caliente contiene más fibra y menos proteína digestible, lo que significa que comer la hoja llevaría más tiempo para procesar sus nutrientes.

Estos cambios pueden obligar a algunas especies de gorilas y monos a permanecer sentados durante largos períodos de tiempo que de otro modo utilizarían para la búsqueda de alimentos, proteger el territorio o el mantenimiento de los lazos sociales.

Una falta de acción, combinada con alimentos menos nutritivos, que con el tiempo podría llevar a muchos primates a su ocaso como raza.

Fuentes:YSGXWW (traductor), May Lady y National Geographic

Fotos: Sh.sina.com.cn (traductor)

Y recuerda que también puedes seguirnos en Twitter en @blog_futuretech

 

Otros monetes:

- Autoretrato de macaco con cámara robada

Un gorila que camina como una persona

- ¿Puede un orangután violar a una mujer?

El Baby Yoga, la manera más peligrosa de estimular a tu bebé

 

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Mi enhorabuena al redactor, que ha dado forma al tema más repugnante de la historia de la zoología hasta convertirlo en una delicada poesía de supervivencia, vocación profesional y digestión. Si tuviera un iPhone pediría que me grabaran en su base la frase “comenzó a usar su boca para lamer, sin detenerse en más de una hora, hasta que el pequeño defecó una única y esplendorosa semilla de maní”.

¡Bravo, amigo!

Ya han adquirido los derechos para hacer un thriller en EEUU. Se dice que el cuidador lo interpretará Russell Crowe

Debería haber usado un dedo o un palito.

¿Cacahueses?

Una hora? Eso ya es vício amigo!

en que momento de esa hora se cago el monico?

Yo tambien me comi un cacahuete cuando quieras me lo sacas

Una hora?? Bueno, la esposa de este tipo debe ser una mujer feliz, me imagino!!

“…podría llevar a muchos primates a su ocaso como raza.”
¿Los primates son una “raza”?

Pues si de lamer culos se trata que hubieran llamado a Alfredo Urdaci o a cualquier otro periodisto monárquico del ABC, El Mundo, La Razón o Intereconomía. Con uno de esos el monete caga hasta la primera papilla.

Zhang, no vuelvas a casa hasta que te hayas cepillado la lengua con gasoil. Para lamerle el ojaldre a un mono no tienes problemas, pero tienes el morro de decirme que mis rollitos de primavera saben a mierda. No te preocupes que ahora ya sé cómo hacerte feliz en la mesa, espero que te gusten mis conguitos de langur. Imbécil.

Zhang, te necesito: a mi gorila se le ha atascado un coco sin pelar en el tracto digestivo, y aparte de eso lleva más de tres semanas sin cagar.

El FBI ha solicitado al gobierno chino la extradición de un cuidador del zoológico de Whuhán, en China, a quien acusa pederastia por acosar sexualmente a un langur menor de edad al que practicó un anilingus durante más de una hora. La agencia estadounidense ha aprovechado para advertir a los ciudadanos del grave peligro que supone un Internet sin control por parte de los gobiernos, ya que -según fuentes autorizadas- las imágenes de ese acto abominable estaban fácilmente disponibles en la red.

Ya, ya… Seguro que es él quien les da cacahuetes a los monos.

El viejo truco de los cacahuetes…

Espero que para los hipopótamos tenga otro sistema.

Ya veo a los demás monos peleándose por el próximo cacahuete.

Lamer culos de monos, masturbar rinocerontes… todo es ponerse.

Y si coges al mono con la mano, pones los labios así como morreandole el ojete haciendo efecto ventosa y succionas creando efecto vacío no le saldría el CACAhuete antes?

Si para salvar a una especie tengo que hacer eso, mis hijos van a vivir en un mundo inhóspito…

Actualmente y a raíz de este hecho se está prohibiendo dar cacahuetes a los leones por lo que pudiera pasar.

Eso mismo le pasó a Bush hace unos años. El pobre no podía cagar, hasta que llegó Aznar y le practicó la susodicha maniobra de estimulación.

Zetapé y Rub Al-Caaba son expertos en lamer el culo de terroristas, dictadores de países bananeros y multiculturales, mientras 11 millones de españoles les lamen el culo a ellos.
Dos de ellos son Flora Intestinal y Libertaria.

Entonces, estamos todos de acuerdo a en que ese tipo está enfermo y le molan los monos, ¿no?
Por otro lado, espero que nadie cobre por redactar este tipo de artículos.

Celebro que el monito haya tenido dificultad para defecar y no retención urinaria…

la indigestión que provocará el calentamiento global?
Ahora cualquiera puede escribir un artículo, y lo peor, es que parece que el entiende…

entonces… si el mono tienen cistitis… hay que hacerle un pete?

¿QUE TAL SABIA? bien ¿no? cabroncete

Cacahueses está perfectamente escrito… en asturiano… :0)

gran hombre

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If you click my name on the post above it will take you to our website. I did not mention the actual name in my post as this is primarily about Tim’s blog and Harrys code but since a few of you are asking..LikeLike

Yes, the links are missing. Jeff or Tim?LikeLike

how about with floral ideas? how can i grow my subcribers?LikeLike

Great results with 100k emails in 7 days but it’s not the quantity but quality of emails that really matters. 10k quality emails could convert to more sales than 100k emails of mostly people who aren’t interested in the product. 1) Were these quality emails or people that mostly just wanted free stuff?2) How much did the campaign earn? “For example, some of our friends could reach entire companies. We’d ask people individually share Harry’s with their teams.” Most people don’t have access to CEOs. So I’m curious 3) How many companies were reached?4) How Big were they?.” These were largely people who were close to us with large followings or access to companies that sent out blasts on our behalf.5) How large were the followings? 50k 100k or more?6) How large were the company blasts?Tim, please tell us the answers.I would like to think the average person could get similar results by following this strategy but until we have the answers to these questions we won’t know if the average person would be lucky to get 100 emails or less in a week following this same plan..Until we have these answers (although it looks like a detailed plan of action to get approximately 100k emails in a week) it’s really just another general article that offers us potentially false hope.The title to this article makes it sound like you just plug in to the strategy and WALLA you have the magic recipe onHow to Gather 100,000 Emails in One Week (Includes Successful Templates, Code, Everything You Need)I really hope it is a real recipe for the average person with less resources and connections to get similar results. Please show us.LikeLike

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I’ll follow this to the “T” for our launch of [Moderator: link removed] . It would be so great to have it take off like a rocket and apparently, we have more control over that than I thought !LikeLike

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Kudos for the transparency, great to read the reasoning behind your decisions, even down to the details in the copywriting. Just lost about 15 minutes browsing your site, ‘Five O’ Clock’ magazine, and social media profiles.. the branding is fantastic, there’s a consistent polish to everything.Now just wish I was American so I could apply for your designer vacancy in NY!LikeLike

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This is an amazing case study. A couple of things I wanted to point out.1. The virality achieved was amazing, but still wasn’t the “hockey stick” style that people seem to expect… no matter how unrealistic the expectation is. Having 77 of the leads come from sharing though… is great. It’s probably because:2. The lowest level goals felt achievable. Getting 5 people to do something for a reward feels very plausible for most people. Having the stepped goals gave everyone something they could look forward to, but still provided fuel for:3. The influencers at the high end feeling like their efforts were worthwhile. It provided something for them to look forward to.Because they weren’t getting > 1 people signed up for every single signup they still had to do a LOT of work to market their idea and get the word out.They were willing to give away a lot. Some people don’t make the awards worthwhile. Giving away product to 3,000 people is not cheap… but probably cheaper than if they’d had to replace all the referrals with purchased traffic.[Moderator: link removed]Thanks,Josh Ledgard[Moderator: link removed]LikeLike

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Awesome! It seems to be a running theme lately with startups. The more you give and truly appreciate your customers, the more you receive. Would love to hear an update in 6 months or so to see how their initial launch continues to pay off for them.LikeLike

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Wow! What a long explanation! However, Clinton has not been interviewed by the FBI and no indictment has been issued at this time. It is the end of June. Maybe she has done all these things, and maybe not. My only question is: if Clinton is not indicted or later convicted, are you willing to do another very long apology piece, and leave this profession in shame? Put your money where your mouth is; otherwise, you are just a conspiracy nut.LikeLike

This is exactly how a referral campaign should look like. This is proof why ebooks and giveaways are not working. People want physical products in exchange for a share and the product must be something that’s worth sharing. I once offered a Samsung Galaxy tablet for those who get the most people sign up for my mobile app and no one shared the website. I am not sure if the tablet was the only reason for people not sharing it, but it definitely played a part. Maybe it scared people off that only one person could have won it. Next time I will offer cheaper products for the first 10 persons and see how it goes.LikeLike

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If you click my name on the post above it will take you to our website. I did not mention the actual name in my post as this is primarily about Tim’s blog and Harrys code but since a few of you are asking..LikeLike

Great post full of a simple plan. I always enjoy getting the chance to peek inside of companies strategies. Thanks for sharing. It reminds me a lot of the MailBox App when it first launched, or when Dropbox launched…I still haven’t paid for the service.LikeLiked by 1 person

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As someone who has worked in email marketing for a decade I can tell you with absolute certainty that Harry’s problems are just beginning and I’d urge any business to research much more widely before embarking on a viral campaign like this with email.Rapid list growth like this becomes a nightmare for on-going engagement once the initial “FREE STUFF!” campaign ends. Expectations are now sky-high. The churn rate on the subscriber list could burn your sender reputation unless engagement is sustained, relevant, and meaningful. This could mean that email delivery becomes much slower (higher deferrals), inbox placement suffers (we live in the age of the priority inbox and smart sweeping), and you burn through your SendGrid IPs and get your account closed. Future marketing via an email channel is going to suffer.This campaign also teeters on the very edge of what is legal. In the EU, for example, this kind of viral campaign is incredibly close to looking like a dodge of the prior consent rule. In the eyes of the UK’s ICO, the “instigator” of the message is not the 3rd party — it’s Harry’s. Therefore Harry’s are responsible for any malicious act resulting from this campaign and any distress it caused people who did not welcome receiving the viral email. I also hope that Harry’s were very clear in the management of the data. The email addresses of the forwarded contacts are not owned by them and they do not have consent for further marketing activities without an explicit opt-in. Or double opt-in as they’re US-based.LikeLike

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