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La inocentada de Ofiuco, o por qué no se puede cambiar el zodiaco de buenas a primeras

29 diciembre 2011 - 11:07 - Autor:

Efectivamente, la historia del Ofiuco era la inocentada de ayer, como muy bien han visto un 30,06% de los participantes en la encuesta. Para un 19,64% fue el rapopero MC Hammer el que saltaba sobre la pista de la duda, aunque presentó su buscador hace menos de dos meses; mientras que el tercer lugar lo ocupa con un 14,29% el napolitano Darco Sangermano, que efectivamente expulsó una bala por la nariz tras unos moviditos fastos del año nuevo pasado.

Puedes ver el porcentaje del resto de las noticias aquí. Enhorabuena a todos los que vieron a Ofiuco en las estrellas.

Y es que el tema del Serpentario trae cola como un cometa. Quizá sea el meme tapadillo del año, pues lleva dando bandazos desde el 14 de enero de 2011, cuando el Planetario de Minessota simplemente mencionó en un periódico local, el Star Tribune, que para ser consecuentes con la realidad física de nuestra Tierra, sería bueno actualizar el zodiaco, que llevaba 2.000 años impasible, pues científicamente la rotación de nuestro planeta ha cambiado ligeramente desde entonces. Y que metiendo un signo más, el Ofiuco, todo quedaría más cuadrado.

Sin embargo, lo que sólo era un artículo ligero y simpático, comenzó a hacerse un hueco en los medios, con el titular cambiando como el teléfono estropeado hasta que incluso llegó a decirse que oficialmente se cambiaba el zodiaco. Nada más lejos de la realidad. De hecho, en la Información publicamos la noticia al respecto, mostrando el alarmismo que se creó.

¿Se imaginan lo que significaría un signo más? Además de cientos de millones de cartas del Tarot tiradas a la basura, una verdadera crisis de identidad en algo tan suyo y tan nuestro como son los signos del zodiaco, el D.N.I estelar con el que nacemos y que al parecer nos muestra nuestra dirección vital escrita.

Porque meter un signo más significaría desplazar todos los demás. La nueva constelación del Sol desde el 29 de noviembre al 17 de diciembre que viene representada por Asclepio, el hijo ilegítimo de Apolo, provocaría que el 85% de una familia perdería su signo habitual.

Sólo los nacidos en 38 días de los 365 que tiene al año se quedan con su signo de nacimiento, a razón de 10 en Leo, 8 en Piscis, 7 en Tauro, 5 en Virgo, 3 en Sagitario, 2 en Acuario, 2 en Aries y 1 en Cáncer. Las casas de Géminis, Libra, Escorpio y Capricornio quedarían desoladas, con sus habitantes desparramados por el resto de los signos adyacentes.

Eso significa que sólo 4,8 millones de habitantes de España permanecerían allí donde nacieron, mientras 42,5 millones se convierten en “desplazados astrológicos”. La catástrofe es aún mayor si miramos las cifras mundiales, pues 6.300 de los 7.000 millones de habitantes pierden su signo zodiacal.

Aunque muchos de ellos tienen la fortuna de adorar falsos zodíacos, como el maya o el chino, de modo que no sufrirán con tanta intensidad el cataclismo de la inocencia astral.


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en que te basas para afirmar que el zodiaco maya es falso

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